You’ve made a mistake and you’re feeling awful about it.Some one else made a mistake and you’re perturbed.You couldn’t accomplish something and again you’re feeling low.Someone surprised you with their behavior and you’re left anxious and disturbed.You suddenly lost your cool,or you were handed disturbing news and now you are enveloped by heaviness.How do you get rid of it?You want to regain your equilibrium again.Better still,you don’t want to lose your balance at all,to start with.I have some tips here which promise succor in such times.
1.Maintain a Decided Calm To Begin With.
Remain calm at all times,come what may.When we have fallen from grace it’s good to remind ourselves to be calm because calmness is a fantastic rejuvenator.It helps to draw in happiness.When we remain calm there is a strange phenomenon whereby happiness automatically follows.Even if we ourselves have momentarily lost our cool it’s good to revert back to a state of calmness.Helps to bounce back.
2.Expect The Best In Future.
The secret to feeling good is to expect the best in the future inspite of anything that has happened now,or in the past.Expecting good,and optimism,does trigger off a chain of events at the cosmic level that eventually lead to positive results in the future.
3.Look For Things To Appreciate And Enjoy Around You.
Immediately following the event,you may not feel there is anything much worthy of liking or appreciating.Yet if we apply ourselves with a little more balance,and deliberation we can find at least something worthy of appreciation.What this does is that our tendency to compulsive rumination over the event reduces.Something good is available and capable of distracting the stream of our thoughts positively,in that instant.If we care to stay with process there is a gradual,yet assured positive shift from the blanket of negativity swirling around us.
4.Past Events May Not Repeat Again.
It’s a fact we need to remind ourselves promptly;that some unpleasant experience now ,or in the past, doesn’t automatically imply that the same thing will repeat itself again in future.Usually we are guilty of projecting anxiety into the future as well,setting off a chain reaction of negativity.We do well to reassure ourselves of better outcomes.That’s positive belief.
5.Not How Far You Fall,How High You Bounce.
The adage “its not how far you fall,but how high you bounce that matters” is valuable advice.You realize that a lot of people fall when they are in the thick of things.But the real winners are those who get up from their fall ,dust themselves off the fall, and carry on regardless.It’s our focus on resurgence that ensures our growth.
6.Jettison The Unpleasant Quickly.
It’s a boon to possess the skill to forget unhappy incidents quickly.There is little baggage to lug around when we get adept at letting go of needless unhappiness.Bouncing back has a lot to do with travelling forward.Travelling light.
7.Sense Of Humour ;Lighten Yourself Up.
A sense of humour gives us excellent leverage to exploit the value of a fall.Firslty we become better learners when we can smile easily.And secondly,humour in the moment of trouble becalms our nerves.It’s also an excellent buffer emotion to fall back on,in trying times.It offers us a much needed mellowing time to regain our balance.
8.Don’t Be Soooo Serious.It’s OK.
Often when we fall we are guilty of taking the situation very seriously;as if the incident has heralded the end of the world for us.This is a very common reaction.And a fallacious one at that.No one incident ever ended the world for any one.One can research the history of the world for that.So it makes goodsense maintain equanimity and retain a perspective.
9.Pardon Fast And Firmly…..Self And Others.
When you are about the act of jettisoning the past its good to let go of any gathering cloud of grudges which are building up around a seed thought, against others or yourself.Yes you need to pardon your own self as well,lest you make a deep dent in your own happiness and self esteem.And when you do pardon any one,including yourself; do it firmly.
10.Focus On Inner Response Than Outer Circumstance.
At the time when something untoward transpires we enter a state of turmoil primarily because most of our attention is focused outside.On outer circumstances.There is little concern with how we are responding to the outer situation.However it’s the inner response that is more important than anything else.When you become more attentive to your own response, instead of exclusively focusing on the outer circumstances,the doorway to growth,and empowerment, gradually opens.
11.Leave The Old, Past Self Behind.
We all have more than one self,depending on the amount of time we have spent focusing on a specific emotion.As we move through life we can make a resolve to release all past selves,which do not serve our purpose, and leave them behind.One such self is the one attached to past unwholesome events strongly,and this needs to go if we are to navigate through our life with an empowered,and positive outlook.We can make a conscious choice to leave the past behind,not ruminate over it;and if the temptation to “past-bashing” is too strong,it’s best to view the “dead events” through a detached vision.
12.Make Life Flow Easily For Yourself.
Usually, soon after a disturbing incident, we unconsciously enter a phase of conflict.We deny,we hyper-analyse,we refuse to accept,we plot to get even,we regret,we choose to feel deceived, or wronged.Well,all we accomplish with all this is to build a subtle, yet intense resistance within our “inner landscape”.A going against the grain of the country,if you please.It feels like we are toiling uphill with a mammoth load on our back.It’s punishing our own selves, essentially. It’s unlikely we would do that to another person ,so intensely ,and so relentlessly.So what’s the alternative?Just realize you need to back up a bit and release your tensely withheld breath.You need to breathe easy and literally let the life force flow easily through you.Make your inner landscape more freer and reduce the dense undergrowth of resistance,made of a accumulated negativity.Remember,the quality of your life depends profoundly on how easily,happily,gratefully and calmly you spend your moments.You owe it to yourself.And your atitude makes all the difference.
Over to you my friends.....